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Have You Ever Kissed an Ashtray?  (Pucker-Up!)
Smoking is not only a health issue, but it is a relationship issue...at least it was in my marriage.  People can only be tolerant of a bad habit...and a dangerous habit...only for so much!  Smoking was not the only reason why my ex and I divorced, but smoking played a part in it.

Old Glory affords everyong the freedom to express their opinion(s), and I have mine about smoking and smokers, which is as follows:

SMOKER: (definition) a dragon-like figure, such as "puff" the magic dragon, which i represented as having a reptilian body and breaths and emits smoke and fire!

STUPID: (definition) marked by a lack of intelligence.

FOOL: (definition) one who id deficient in judgement or understanding.

DUMB: (definition) conspicuously unintelligent. 

DRAGON: (definition) something very formidable or dangerous.

I HAVE ZERO TOLERANCE FOR SMOKING AND SMOKERS!

Everytime I see a smoker, it reminds me of a dragon, with smoke bellowing out of the mouth, nose, ears, and probably places where the sun don't shine!  Every time my ex-wife and I would invite a few "dragons" (who smoked), over to the house for dinner or entertainment, the place looked like it was on fire, with smoke coming out all of the windows.  I was always concerned that the smoke alarms would go off, the the neighbors would call the fire department, and with those powerful water hoses they have, would come into the house and destroy it all, etc.

*          *          *
It's really simple to understand...I don't want smokers around me!  With that attititude and the number of smokers around, that pretty much leaves me out in the woods by myself, doesn't it?  But, I'd rather be alone, than to be around a smoker!  I know all about smoking, because I smoked for about five years, before I quit back in 1970, which is one of the best things I've done for me and those around me!

But, smoking is not only dangerous in a health sense, but it is dangerous to a relationship as well.  When I met my ex-wife in the 1970's, smoking was fashionable and trendy, and she smoked the entire 19 years we were together.  But at that time, it didn't matter to me that much that she smoked, so smoking wasn't an issue.  But, as time went on, she started smoking more and more, and it started having an effect on our relationship.  I think the anti-smoking movement started in the early 1990's and that's about the time when our relationship started to go downhill, and part of the reason was because of her smoking!

For 19 years I tolerated smoking, and I tried to help Wendy stop smoking, and all of it fell on deaf ears.  She was always afraid to gain weight if she quit, but I told her if she gained weight, I would help with that, too!  (in one ear and out the other).  As time went on, she always seemed to have a cigareete in her mouth.  After about 17 or 18 years of this, and I started to become annoyed, and smoking rose to the top of our priority list. 

When I first met her, she was a light smoker, smoking a cigarette here and a cigarette there.  She was a casual smoker, so I didn't raise the red flag at the time, etc.  But, as the years went by, her smoking got worse and worse, and I naturally worried about her. First thing in the morning...a cigarette!  The last thing at bedtime...a cigarette!  And, if she woke up in the middle of the night...another cigarette!  Every morning, she work up coughing and choking!  I was getting very upset over this!

The cigarette became her constant companion!  I would get so mad, when I went into the kitchen and, as she was preparing a meal...there was that damn cigarette hanging out of her mouth, and I would put it out in the kitchen sink and drowse it. 

Smoking was affecting our relationship, and we were arguing and fighting more and more, and not speaking to each other more and more, as time went on.  Our two boys, were 10 and 12 at the time, and I know that smoking was affecting their well-being as well.  She had the attitude that she was going to get her little "fix" and/or "pleasure" no matter what!  She was selfish!  She didn't want to see the other point of view.  She wouldn't even go outside to smoke!

And, I had the attitude that we were having a big problem here, and we were going to have to find a solution for it, or we might not be together much longer.  If I brought up the smoking issue, she would just walk away!

When two people argue and fight a lot of the time, the relationship begins to sour and probably will die.  It finally came to the point, when we were talking to each other verky little.  Over the ykears, she probably wondered why I kissed her very little...who wants to kiss an ashtray?  To make a long story short, we parted our ways in 1995, and smoking and all the fighting that went with it, was one of the reasons for going our separete ways. 

Today, (2006) I'm single (by choice) and if another woman crosses my path sometime in the future, she will NOT be a smoker!  If she is...she can just keep on going.  Research has shown that second hand smokes kills as does smoking itself.  So, for nineteen years, I have no idea what the second hand smoke has done to me.  Nineteen years with a smoker is enough! 
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Copyright; Jerry Aragon; 2007
All Rights Reserved
My articles published 200+ websites
To all the young people out there...STAY IN SCHOOL!
Jerry Aragon/The Humor Doctor           humordoctormd@gmail.com
Main Street/Front Page                         Free Stuff/Come see
Site Map/site contents                          The Creative Center
Writers Section                                     The Humor Clinic
The Funny Farm                                   Book: BumpyRoad of Life